What role does ego play in your life? Over the past few years, I have been working to become more aware of my ego, recognize it’s obsession with survival, and appreciate when it roars at me with the intention to keep me safe and alive. Some days this is easier than others. There are times when my ego feels extra sensitive and needy, while other days it seems to be fast asleep, not paying attention to anything I do.
There are many ways one can define and recognize ego. Some days, it is working overtime to make me feel as small as possible, telling me stories about how I am not enough, unworthy, or a burden. Other days, I feel my ego itching to be recognized as important, valued, and witnessed. This is a complicated aspect to our human condition: wanting to be seen while at the same time feeling unworthy of attention.
Now, I don’t have a perfect prescription for combatting all of the tricks and treats of our brains. That is the mysterious beauty of these magnificent organs. Each and every brain is unique and requires different tools to keep balanced. While there is no single quick fix, I have found that by checking in on my ego and acknowledging that it is playing a role in every move I make, I can (at least slightly) release the grip that it can, at times, have on my identity and confidence.
Do you ever check in on your ego? It can be an eye opening process to simply take a time out and ask, “Is this my ego talking?” On the days when I feel like I am under-qualified, over-qualified, missing out, friendless, on the wrong path, lonely, flush with opportunity, overbooked, failing at life, too much, not enough, or an ugly human monster, it is usually my ego at play. My ego wants me to stand in the spotlight AND hide in the shadows. Ego prefers consistency, habits, and routines. If you are in the midst of shifts, changes, and expansion, your ego just might be panicking about your survival. It means well, I swear.
An ego check-in is now a part of my daily sparkle practice. I try to keep an eye out for it at least once per day. If I am feeling ALL THE EMOTIONS, it is usually a sure sign of ego trying to slow my roll. Truly, just reminding myself that my ego is always working on survival can allow me to be kind to myself. If I pause, take a deep breath, check in with myself, and find ego roaring or telling tales, then hopefully, I can shift gears, change the story, and re-center. Acknowledging and expressing gratitude for our brain’s interest in survival is a great way to diffuse some of the negative emotions that ego can launch our way.
Ego exists for very good reasons. Our complicated, beautiful brains are amazing, and ego plays a major role in this mystery. This week, I challenge you to get to know your ego. Acknowledge where it helps you and where it might be holding you back. Keep an eye out for it every day. Thank it for the support. When you are feeling overwhelmed with feelings, ask ego what role it is playing. By shining light on this aspect of our human condition, we allow it to aid in our sparkle.
Could you use some support and guidance in getting to know your ego, embracing your true self, and expanding your vitality and sparkle? Reach out. Let’s Sparkle Together.